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I just finished chatting with fourtyeighthparallel. I’d never met
48th, lets call her “Lisa” before, so when she contacted me, I was
more than a little suspicious. First she asked me a/s/l, and then
told me what a/s/l was, in case I didn’t know. (Age/Sex/Location.)
Lisa told me she was a 27 year old female living in the USA. Not that
I have experience in this, but typically when people answer a/s/l,
they mention a state, since “USA” is a little vague.

So, at least she didn’t say she was 14, which would have clued me in
that I was actually chatting with the federal government, which rarely
has a positive outcome. But, then she told me she was just hanging
out, watching television, and got a little horny.

It would follow that, if a 27 year old girl is at home alone and
feeling horny, she would immediately go to my blog, where I have
recently listed my yahoo chat ID, and contact me to see if I wanted to
have “a little cyber fun.” (Hey, it could happen.)

I may have mentioned I was suspicious, but more than that, I was at
work. What good is it for me to get all worked up while I’m at work?
So, that’s what I told Lisa, “I’m at work.” Then she asked me
something about my pants and her knees, it got a little fuzzy around
then, but I repeated that I was at work, and that perhaps she could
contact me this evening. (I have kids, you have to plan these things
in advance.)

During the exchange, I also began chatting with my wife, telling her
the whole story. Using her super-librarian powers for good, she found
fortyeighthparallel on Yahoo Profiles, where we discovered that her
name was Lisa, and she was somehow involved with an organization
called CyberChatGirls. There were some pictures of Lisa on the site,
andâ?¦well, why am I telling you, you’ve already gone there, haven’t
you. Anyway, “Lisa” is a pretty girl. Whether I was actually chatting
with the girl in the pictures is up for debate, but I’m sure someone
less jaded than I could easily imagine that to be the case.

Perhaps Lisa will contact me tonight, we’ll chat for a while, and then
she’ll ask me to go to CyberChatGirls.com where for a small fee, I can
see nudie pictures of her, and perhaps see a live cam of her on the
phone with me. She seems pretty good at closing the deal, so I’ll be
sure to lock my credit card away somewhere safe.

The point is, everyone in the world is trying to sell something. I’m
trying to sell myself as a funny guy, Lisa is trying to sell herself
as a fun girl to talk to, who is not afraid to get her virtual knees
dirty. But, it just feels so commercial, so contrived, so unabashedly
capitalistic.

I guess I’ll take my chat ID off of my blog. I thought it might be
fun, but I just feel so used now. And, maybe in my Yahoo profile,
I’ll change “Married but looking” to just “Married.” I thought it was
funny, but apparently, it means different things to different people.

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