Unfocused Content

Did you know that a Fauchard* does 1D6 damage when wielded by a small to medium sized creature? Of course you didn’t, because you don’t have a Dungeon Master Screen. But I do. Before you go labeling me, know that I have played D&D exactly 3 times in my life. The first was in eight grade.(Grade 8 if you are Canadian) I got off the bus at this kid Eric’s stop so he could teach me how to play. (I was interested to see what the hype was about.)

“So, I roll dice, and you make shit up, that’s the game,” I asked?

“That’s the game,” he said.

“Wow - that’s stupid,” I said.

So, I didn’t feel the need to play again until college. Ah, the rebellion. Other kids drank or did drugs, but I played D&D. Actually, just one night, as a fill in. There were more people, so it went a little better, but I still was not hooked.

I didn’t buy in to the make believe. And, as I have reflected on this tonight I realized, I have never bought in to make believe. Even as a kid, when my neighbor would want to pretend, I just didn’t see the point. “But, you’re not a girl,” I would say. (I hope that joke does not take away from the point I am trying to make, I was never ever a good pretender.) So, why is it that I am desperately trying to make shit up all the time (ala fiction) when I have never ever been good at it?

Good question…

The third time I played D&D was with my kids, and I was DM. All we did was roll the dice and find cool treasure. It was still pretty lame.

But, why do I have the DM screen you ask? For writing of course. I also have the Players Handbook, Monster Manual, Priest’s handbook, Fighter’s handbook, Psionics handbook, Ranger’s handbook, and Book of Elves.

Not that I don’t consider myself a D&D dork. I read the books, I play the video games, everything short of actually getting together with other people and pretending to be a 15th level Druid/Palidan/Ranger with Epic level weapons and a bugbear follower.

So, does that make me a dork? Does the lack of ability to pretend preclude me from ever being a great fiction writer? Can you even have a bugbear follower? I’d better check the handbook.

*I think that’s what’s in the picture. 

Popularity: 4% [?]