Unfocused Content

I feel a little like Inigo Montoya in that, I’ve been doing the parent thing for so long that when I am not parenting, I don’t know what to do with myself. We dropped our kids off at camp on Sunday afternoon, and have had no communication with them since then. Camps, in general, feel that it builds character to cut off kids’ communications with their parents – like prison, or the army. While it may be good for the kids’ character, I must admit that I am struggling with it, a little bit.

Of course, I lied - we have had one communique from the inside. Yesterday we received a letter in the mail that went something like this.

“Dear Mother and/or Father,

Pursuant to Article 4, Section 9 of the Universal Camp Code, I am writing to inform you that I am having a great* time at camp. My counselors are wonderful (and fully licensed in the State of Colorado to administer aid should a life or limb-threatening situation arise.) Tomorrow we are probably going horseback riding,** or engaging in some other pre-approved activity such as swimming*** or hiking,**** at the discretion of the aforementioned counselor and with the full support of the Camp and its staff.

I hope you are well.

Signed,

Child’s Name

*Great, here, means that all the child’s basic needs are being met and does not constitute a guarantee of fun.

**Horse supplies may be limited. Not available in all states.

*** Child must first pass a basic “swim” test before being admitted to any body of water. Children who do not swim will come home stinky, as this is how we bathe.

**** By hiking, we mean walking, basically, but with a water bottle. Also there will be nature in some areas, so children allergic to nature will be re-directed to another activity.

I must admit that while it was nice to hear from the kiddo, the letter left me feeling a little like she’d been kidnapped by The Gobblers and was maybe being forced to write things she didn’t really feel. When I was at camp, we didn’t write home because we were too busy setting fire to things and overturning our canoes to see if we could survive. (It was Boy Scout camp. I maybe should have mentioned that first.) But, we did have “parent night” where, as you probably guessed, the parents came. That was a good way, I think, to stave off the home-sickness, and I can’t help wishing that my kids’ camp had something similar.

But, they don’t, so unless the older daughter writes a letter - which is doubtful, since I don’t think she packed stationary like the little one – that’s all we get until Friday night. Sigh.

You are probably wondering what we are doing with our free time. You shant need wonder any longer. Mostly, we are drinking heavy, not watching the Disney channel and rescuing random animals that we find wandering the streets. But, I feel as though I should save that for tomorrow’s blog.

Have a great day.

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